Your inner voice is a dick

My inner voice is mostly a jerk and sometimes it feels like a battle that just can’t be won. It’s a work in progress that I’m sure most of you can relate to.

We all have an internal dialogue that runs all the time. Sometimes it’s positive, maybe it’s mostly it’s neutral, and on occasion, it might be negative. Maybe you experience all of those in one day! Some individuals are better than others at manipulating it, shutting it off, or have a little more awareness about what thoughts/emotions drive your internal dialogue.

The toxic effects of negative self-talk:

You will believe and become what you repeatedly tell yourself

First of all, perfect just isn’t attainable. If you live in that black and white mentality, you’ve probably said to yourself that if something isn’t perfect, then it’s simply not good enough and it’s back to the drawing board. This only creates endless amounts of picking yourself apart, hating your completed work or projects, and never making the progress you want or need to make.

Research shows that unmanaged negative self-talk can lead to feelings of hopelessness, anxiety, and depression.

Whether you ARE that friend or you can immediately identify someone in your circle that struggles with it, we all know how upsetting or awkward constant self-criticism is to be around. This can also come across as needy, insecure, or anxious.

The captions in this video were actual thoughts that were going through my head during these front squats (how mean!). I recognized it afterward and realized that when I was an athlete, I never allowed that shit to creep into my mind when I was doing anything with strength work. I had the attitude that I could do whatever I loaded onto the barbell and I very rarely failed. I know it required skill and strength back then, but I also know that my inner dialogue being a badass is what made me strong as fuck. I believed whatever she said!

So, let’s work on taking control of your inner voice today by taking these 5 simple steps:

#1- Live in the present – your inner dialogue loves to compare. It loves to think about what might have been (past) or what might be (future). Focus on the now, what’s happening today, and what is actually in your control.

#2- Gratitude for the things you have and the person you are – When you are intentional about identifying these things, it WILL bring more light, positivity, and good vibrations into your world. This will also help prevent you from going down the road of endlessly wanting more or less of whatever your focus is on and what you’re comparing yourself to.

#3- Give your inner voice a name – Do you remember the SNL skit where they had a character called Debbie Downer? She literally found something negative to say about every situation (sometimes I can relate to this!) haha 😉 If you can give your inner voice a silly or distinct nickname, it can help you recognize and become more aware of your thoughts in a less threatening way.

#4- Think like a friend- Can you imagine if you said some of the things you think about yourself out loud to a friend? When you catch yourself saying or thinking negative things about yourself, reverse it and imagine how it would make someone feel if you said it to them… because you likely wouldn’t even go down that road. YOU deserve that same respect from YOU!

#5- Challenge your inner voice- The most damaging aspect of negative self-talk is that it often goes unchallenged. Whether you are unaware or you are just so used to negative thoughts, it’s never a bad idea to cross-examine your self-talk and fight back a little. Ask yourself the following questions:

– Is this thought true?

– Is this thought actually, fully, 100% true?

– How do you feel when you listen to the thought?

– How would you feel without the thought?

– Now, turn the thought to the opposite

*These questions are to help battle ANT’s (automatic negative thoughts) from Dr. John Assaraf

Are you up for the challenge? What’s your plan of action to start fighting back with your negative inner dialogue today?!